Monday, April 11, 2011

My Ego Mind

Well - Elaine here! This morning I went out to Long Reef Headland (I will put some pics in the Oz pages blog later) - to take the dogs for a walk - it was nice to get out and be with nature and be alone with my thoughts for a while.

Since we have had an offer on the house and it is potentially 'happening' - I have been feeling as flat as a pancake and struggling with that in itself because I felt that I should be overjoyed! So ... after a fair bit of self analysis this morning, I came to the conclusion that it is just my 'ego mind' that is making me feel unsettled .. that little voice in your head that says things like ...

"but you are giving up this lovely house - you will never get another one"
"you will be homeless - you've got to have bricks and mortar - it's no good just having a boat"
"you've done so much work on the house - what a shame to give up on it now - what a waste"
"you will never be able to get back to Sydney / you will be out of the housing market"
"you won't have enough money to live on - you will have to go back to work 40+ hours a week - but then you are too old to get a job like that anyway"

etc etc ...

The ego mind (or the lower self) is the 'devil on your shoulder' as my mum used to call it! It is the part of your mind that wants to keep you stuck - not to move on or progress in anyway. It is part of the self that detests you following your heart and achieving ultimate happiness and contentment. I found a quote somewhere that said "without guidance from the heart, we’re merely playing notes on a piano, not composing a melody". Oh so true ...

Anyway .. so there I was this morning - wandering around Long Reef with the dogs waiting for my friend to arrive and I rang Paul at work. At that moment I remembered why this plan is so valid. If we don't follow it, we will carry on doing as we are doing for a long time - Paul will be busily working away - barely seeing the light of day - and I will be doing my work all hours of the day (but which I do love!) - but the thought of Paul, myself and the animals all being able to spend so much time together - in nature (literally immersed in it!) - a without rushing around and being exhausted at the end of the day is such a precious opportunity - and I realised that we must fight our 'ego minds' and keep our focus on our heart's desires.

It is my true belief that the ego mind keeps us in fear and if we can rise above it or at least recognise it - and trust in the Universe / God - then he / it will provide. We already have so much more than so many people - we really are truly blessed with this magnificent opportunity that is presented to us here and we must truly keep that top of mind at all times - with an 'attitude of gratitude' !

When I got home I decided to put all these thoughts onto the Blog and found that Paul had gotten there before me !!! Paul is more 'black and white' than myself but I think we are in the same place ! Any comments would be appreciated ! Better get to work now ! Elaine xx

2 comments:

  1. Elaine, to you too... it's ok to have second thoughts, or cold feet. Perfectly understandable when making such a huge move. You've thought about and planned this decision for a long time so don't doubt yourself now. You're going to be living a dream! I'm sure you'll start to feel better and get excited about what's coming. Don't worry... I know we'll feel the same when the time comes.
    Thoughts with you both,
    Elly and Mick

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  2. Hi Elaine and Paul
    I wrote a response from work earlier today on my night shift, but it was blocked!

    What you're feeling is totally understandable. When Barry first talked of his plans to buy a narrowboat and live on it, and sell his house and business, I thought he was completely insane! He talked me round and eventually all fell into place - but not without some struggle.

    Both times that we've left here to go to UK for 5-6 months we've had cold feet and wondered what on earth we're doing, but once we arrived there and got back onto the canals, it all slipped away and we had the most incredible experiences.

    Should you keep property or not? Who knows the right answer, we're still thinking about what we will do WHEN we return in a year or two, it's a scary prospect.

    Here's a saying for you "there is no such thing as a wrong decision, you are making the best choice for you, based on what you know and feel at a particular point in time.'

    Carpe Diem - seize the day. So many people remin in their 'status quo' and only talk of their dreams until one day it's too late. There's so much more to life than property and saving for your retirement, the most important things in life are people.

    Don't worry about feeling anxious, it's normal, just keep it all in perspective, you're in the chaos phase of the change cycle!

    Email if you need any support.

    Sandra
    xx

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